Category: My journey – daily devotional

No, I don’t want to go on this breast cancer journey!

 

IMG_20180626_101000Today I’m sitting in a room with this view – a gorgeous gift from my loving Heavenly Father to me.  Over the weekend, I jumped on an airplane and traveled more than 2,700 miles to this beautiful destination.  We planned this trip awhile back, and I was really excited to get away,  relax in this gorgeous place where we can walk on the beach, smell the wonderful ocean air, have some R & R and just enjoy being together.  This trip had been planned for some time, prior to God telling me that I had a “lump”.  It’s so amazing how our lives can change over night, but that topic is for another post.

Before we left on this trip, I was really busy planning, packing and making all the necessary arrangements.  My mind was filled with so much to do all at once – the trip, taking care of last minute business and home details, along with the addition of new doctor appointments and tests.  But once we walked onto the airplane, all that busyness came to an abrupt halt.  The flight was a long one and my mind settled down on one thing – this new diagnosis.  I came up with one conclusion – I DON’T WANT TO GO ON THIS NEW JOURNEY of battling breast cancer!  I really wanted to come on this trip, but I REALLY don’t want this new journey that’s ahead for me.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I absolutely belive in miracles, because I’m truly a walking miracle myself.  And I absolutely believe that our God – Father, Son, Jesus Christ, and Holy Spirit still heals today, and that sometimes He heals in miraculous ways even using medicine.  I believe that He can heal me and that He will heal me.  What I don’t know is how He will choose to do that.

So with that said and even knowing that truth, I don’t want to go on this new journey, but…. this one is out of my control, just like the Lyme Disease and a few other journeys I’ve been on in my life.  I didn’t choose it; I certainly don’t want it; and I don’t like it.  HOWEVER, I  do know the One who is in control of my life, and I DO trust Him with every ounce of my being.  I totally believe that nothing in this life can touch me without my loving God filtering every single part of it – for my good and His glory.  You see, as I’ve walked with Jesus Christ through good and bad times, I’ve come to know Him very personally.  As I read His Word; pray with Him;  fellowship with His body, the church; experience the love of my husband and children; and see the beautiful faces of my grandchildren and so much more, I’ve seen His face up close and personal.

I saw Him that day so many years ago, when He bent down and lovingly reached into that deep, dark pit that I was in and offered me His hand.  As I took His hand, He pulled me out of that pit and rescued me through His great salvation, healing and deliverance.  I’ve seen and experienced Him carrying me through the desert during wilderness times, holding me close when I’ve lost loved ones, speaking loving and tender thoughts to me when I felt all alone and abandoned, and celebrating and rejoicing with me over the good things in my life.  I’ve also seen and experienced Him through spiritual and physical battles where He showed Himself as the supreme commander who leads us to victory.

Because I know my God, I know His character, and I know that He’s all loving and trustworthy,  I choose to surrender to His will and His way in my life.  I choose to surrender to Him and trust that He’s guiding me on this new journey through uncharted territories.  In my humanness, this isn’t necessarily easy, but I know from experience that He’s definitely working a good plan in my life, and in fact, He’s working the very BEST plan for my life.  This is true for your life as well no matter what you’re going through.  For those who love God and are called according to His purposes, He’s working out good plans for you right now! (Romans 8:29)  No matter what you’re going through and even though it may not feel or look like it’s good, He’s working the best plan for you, it’s already in the works, and it’s going to be GOOD!

So today, I hold onto the truth of His Word that God is with me and that He has gone before me and will never leave me.    Deuteronomy 31:6 says, “Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you.  He will not leave you or forsake you,” and Deuteronomy 31:8 says, “It is the Lord who goes before you.  He will be with you; He will not leave you or forsake you.  Do not fear or be dismayed.” and again in Hebrews 13:5, “…for He has said, I will never leave you nor forsake you.”  He’s here for you as well.  Reach out and take His hand and let Him lead you into His love, goodness, grace and mercy!

Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to 

prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Journey Begins

Thanks for joining me!

     If you’ve ever questioned or wondered if God speaks to us personally, then please read on, andlet me share with you how this journey began. Almost 6 weeks ago on a Friday night, I was going to bed. My head hadn’t been on the pillow for more than a few minutes and I was still wide awake.  Totally out of the blue, a very clear thought came into my mind,  “You have a lump in your breast.” But, if you can believe it,  I didn’t listen and ignored what I heard and went on to sleep. The next morning, without even a thought of what I had heard the night before, my hand went right to the lump. Like an arrow goes to its target, my hand went right to the lump reminding me of my thought the night before. Yes, I was shocked.

The words in my mind that night were from my loving Father, through Jesus Christ, and the power of the Holy Spirit speaking directly to me.Not only did Jesus Christ speak to me, He directed, maybe through an angel, my hand to go right to the mass.  He is so intimately involved in our lives, and He loves each of us so much and what He desires above all is relationship with us. This isn’t about religion, but about relationship with a very real, very much alive, very much engaged God. He is all loving, all caring and all faithful.

During the last six weeks, I found myself at multiple doctor’s offices, testing facilities and eventually in a breast surgeon’s office scheduling surgery.  I have received prayer from the elders at our church and several groups of friends.  The Lord took me to City Life, a gathering in the name of Jesus Christ of young men and women in their 20’s and 30’s.  There I received prayer, and then a young man in his late 20’s or early 30’s gave me a mighty word from the Lord which has filled my heart with faith, hope, and life (which I will talk about in a later post).

Tomorrow it will be a week since the surgery to remove 2 masses followed up with a section biopsy.  I’ve seen God working in new ways as He has revealed to me clearly, how I am in the palm of His hands.  He has covered me with His peace and grace which have truly surpassed understanding.  I have to admit that I so hoped that I wouldn’t get a call from the surgeon, but yesterday, late afternoon, the phone rang.  It was her.  Honestly, I had thought that if I saw her name come up on my phone, I would totally freak out and fear would take over.  But it didn’t.  The peace that surpasses understanding covered me like a warm, heavy blanket, and THERE WAS NO FEAR in Jesus name. I stood in perfect peace as she spoke the dreaded words, “Both masses are cancer.”

Early this morning, my husband and I met with the breast surgeon to discuss my case.  She was extremely thorough, and went over everything. Again, the peace of God covered both my husband and me.  In fact, we’ve seen this same peace covering our family through most of this.  His covering is not just for me, but for my husband, my family and our friends.  The truth is, Father God, through Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit, the Triune God, is ALWAYS working a good plan.  He always is doing good for us.  We live in a broken world where sin abounds, where bad things happen to good people, and where we just can’t control and explain many things.  But… it’s in this very place where Jesus Christ comes in and works His perfect plan through saving, healing and delivering us.  He is truly a good, good Father!

Many years ago now, Jesus Christ reached down, took my hand, and pulled me out of the bottom of a deep, deep pit.  He saved me, healed me and delivered me and my life has never been the same. If you don’t know this Triune God – Father, Son, Jesus Christ, and Holy Spirit – please don’t let another day go by without calling out to Him. He hears you, He loves you, and He wants a relationship with you.

Much love and many blessings to you.

Philippians 4: 6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

 

post

Waiting & Trusting #1

I titled this “Waiting & Trusting #1” because I’m positive that I’m going to write about trusting in the Lord many times throughout this journey.  One thing that I’m convinced of is that my God, the Triune God-  Father, Son, Jesus Christ and Holy Spirit – the God of the universe is trustworthy.

For 25+ years, I’ve battled Chronic Lyme Disease and the coinfections that hitch a ride along with it.  Throughout that journey, as hard as its been, I’ve come to trust God more and more because I’ve learned that I can trust Him because He is trustworthy.  I don’t blame Him in any way for the Lyme Disease, because I know that we are in a fallen world, and there are bad things that happen to all who inhabit this world.  God is sovereign over all though,  He is in control, and I do believe that He filters everything that comes our way.  He only allows those things to touch us that will ultimately, continuously, and forever be for our good.  I think of Job and his many trials – heartbreaking and really, really hard trials – that ultimately were for his good.

We are not promised an easy ride in this life, but we are promised that God will always be with us (Joshua 1:9), that He is always working good for those who love Him (Romans 8:28, and that He will never leave us (Deuteronomy 31:6) nor forget about us (Hebrews 13:5).  He is always working good for us, no matter how it feels, looks, or seems to our eyes, our flesh or our senses.

So with all of this in my heart, I am waiting once again for a report of the MRI that I had yesterday.  As I’ve been waiting during these last 6 weeks including waiting for the biopsy results this past week,  the Lord brought to mind Psalm 112:7, “They will have no fear of bad news;” and that’s where I’m landing once again.   In my own strength and flesh, this is REALLY hard, especially since I received bad news earlier in the week.  Fear and foreboding can set in which can lead to a spiraling down of negative thoughts which can take a person to a really bad place.  But God tells us what to do during times of waiting for a report in Psalm 112: 7 & 8.  By the way, this psalm describes the  blessings and character of a righteous person (one who is covered by the righteousness of Jesus Christ through salvation; His death and resurrection).  His answer for the times of waiting –  you will not fear nor be afraid of bad news because your heart (mind, will and emotions) is steadfast.  As we purposely fix our thoughts in the direction of Jesus Christ and His goodness, we will not be afraid.  As we fix our gaze like flint onto His character and nature, who He is, and as we walk with unwavering faith, we will not be afraid. Our hearts  are secure and WE WILL NOT FEAR as WE TRUST IN THE LORD!   We will triumph over our enemies!

In this world we will have tribulations and bad news will come.  But… we can walk in faith and not fear a bad report.  But how?  There’s really only one answer:  trust in the Lord with all your heart, knowing that:

  •  He really does love us;
  •  He is working the very best plan for us;
  •  He will provide everything that we need to walk through trials;
  •  His grace is sufficient;
  • And knowing that His resurrection power, that same power that raised Jesus Christ from the grave is at work in our lives this very minute!

Have a very blessed day!

Psalm 112:7 & 8

“They will have no fear of bad news; their hearts are steadfast, trusting in the LORD.” 8 Their hearts are secure, they will have no fear; in the end they will look in triumph on their foes.” New International Version

“They do not fear bad news; they confidently trust the LORD to care for them. 8 They are confident and fearless and can face their foes triumphantly.” New Living Translation

“He will not be afraid of evil tidings; His heart is steadfast, trusting in the LORD. 8 His heart is established; He will not be afraid Until he sees his desire upon his enemies.”

Traveling onward

This is not a journey that I would choose, but so often in life, we travel down roads that we sure wouldn’t choose to go down and we may begin to wonder, “Now, how did I get here?”   This is one of those roads for me, so I’ve decided to journal through this blog for several reasons, but the primary reason is to bring glory to God because He is so absolutely amazing, and He has great things in store on this journey for me.  I hope to share the treasures that He gives me and that He uncovers for me along the way. Who knows, maybe He’ll have some treasures for you too!

Late yesterday afternoon became a little difficult for me.  I was functioning with very little sleep and had been up since 1:30 a.m.  I’m still recovering from the surgery and was detoxing from anesthesia, etc and sleep was the loser in this part of the recovery.  When we’re tired, we’re so vulnerable to negative thinking, and sometimes, those thoughts can spiral downward, and get us off the track that we want to be on.  Thoughts like these can bring on fear and foreboding, and that’s where my thoughts were leading me.  When I let my mind go and let my thoughts lead me rather than the truth of Jesus Christ, I get my focus off and my thoughts go to places that they don’t need to be.

Often we think these thoughts are from ourselves when in fact, they’re from the enemy of God who is our enemy as well.  I knew I needed help so I made some phone calls and sent some text messages.  The Lord brought the help I needed.  This is the body of Christ in action.  When we are weak, God is strong (2nd Corinthians 12:9), and often He brings strength and truth to us through His body – other believers in Jesus Christ.  Truth was spoken to me and prayers of intercession were lifted high on my behalf.  I am so thankful and I slept really well last night.

Today is a new day and the Lord has infused me with His love and grace.  I’m reminded that I must take every thought captive to the obedience of Jesus Christ (2 Corinthians 10: 5) and as my husband has said to me before, “Don’t be lazy with your thoughts!”  So I’m off for an MRI and a whole day ahead of me.  I’m looking for those treasures that the Lord has for me and being careful with my thoughts!  This is the day the Lord has made, I will rejoice in Him today!

Many blessings to you!

Jeremiah 29: 11  “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you and future and a hope.  12 Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. 13 And you will see Me and fine Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.  14 I will be found by you, says the Lord….”

The Journey Begins

Thanks for joining me!

Hearing the Voice of God

If you’ve ever questioned or wondered if God speaks to us personally, then please read on and let me share with you how this part of my journey began. Almost 6 weeks ago on a Friday night, I was going to bed. As I started to relax, a very clear thought came into my mind, totally out of the blue. “You have a lump in your breast.” But I didn’t listen and went on to sleep. The next morning, without even a thought of what I had heard the night before, my hand went right to the lump. Like an arrow goes to its target, my hand went right to the lump reminding me of my thought the night before. Yes, I was shocked.

This was my loving Father, through Jesus Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit speaking directly to me. He is so intimately involved in our lives and He loves each of us so much and what He desires above all is relationship with us. This isn’t about religion, but about relationship with a very real, very much alive, very much engaged God. He is all loving, all caring and all faithful.

He reached down many years ago and pulled me out of a pit and my life has never been the same. If you don’t know this God, Father, Son, Jesus Christ, and Holy Spirit, please don’t let another day go by without calling out to Him. He hears you, He loves you, and He wants a relationship with you.

The words in my mind that night were from my loving Father, through Jesus Christ, and the power of the Holy Spirit speaking directly to me. Not only did Jesus Christ speak to me, He directed, maybe through an angel, my hand to go right to the mass.  He is so intimately involved in our lives, and He loves each of us so much and what He desires above all is relationship with us. This isn’t about religion, but about relationship with a very real, very much alive, very much engaged God. He is all loving, all caring and all faithful.

During the last six weeks, I found myself at multiple doctor’s offices, testing facilities and eventually in a breast surgeon’s office scheduling surgery.  I have received prayer from the elders at our church and several groups of friends.  The Lord took me to City Life, a gathering in the name of Jesus Christ of young men and women in their 20’s and 30’s.  There I received prayer, and then a young man in his late 20’s or early 30’s gave me a mighty word from the Lord which has filled my heart with faith, hope, and life (which I will talk about in a later post).

Tomorrow it will be a week since the surgery to remove 2 masses followed up with a section biopsy.  I’ve seen God working in new ways as He has revealed to me clearly, how I am in the palm of His hands.  He has covered me with His peace and grace which have truly surpassed understanding.  I have to admit that I so hoped that I wouldn’t get a call from the surgeon, but yesterday, late afternoon, the phone rang.  It was her.  Honestly, I had thought that if I saw her name come up on my phone, I would totally freak out and fear would take over.  But it didn’t.  The peace that surpasses understanding covered me like a warm, heavy blanket, and THERE WAS NO FEAR in Jesus name. I stood in perfect peace as she spoke the dreaded words, “Both masses are cancer.”

Early this morning, my husband and I met with the breast surgeon to discuss my case.  She was extremely thorough, and went over everything. Again, the peace of God covered both my husband and me.  In fact, we’ve seen this same peace covering our family through most of this.  His covering is not just for me, but for my husband, my family and our friends.  The truth is, Father God, through Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit, the Triune God, is ALWAYS working a good plan.  He always is doing good for us.  We live in a broken world where sin abounds, where bad things happen to good people, and where we just can’t control and explain many things.  But… it’s in this very place where Jesus Christ comes in and works His perfect plan through saving, healing and delivering us.  He is truly a good, good Father!

Many years ago now, Jesus Christ reached down, took my hand, and pulled me out of the bottom of a deep, deep pit.  He saved me, healed me and delivered me and my life has never been the same. If you don’t know this Triune God – Father, Son, Jesus Christ, and Holy Spirit – please don’t let another day go by without calling out to Him. He hears you, He loves you, and He wants a relationship with you.

Much love and many blessings to you.

Philippians 4: 6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

 

 

post