Today I’m sitting in a room with this view – a gorgeous gift from my loving Heavenly Father to me. Over the weekend, I jumped on an airplane and traveled more than 2,700 miles to this beautiful destination. We planned this trip awhile back, and I was really excited to get away, relax in this gorgeous place where we can walk on the beach, smell the wonderful ocean air, have some R & R and just enjoy being together. This trip had been planned for some time, prior to God telling me that I had a “lump”. It’s so amazing how our lives can change over night, but that topic is for another post.
Before we left on this trip, I was really busy planning, packing and making all the necessary arrangements. My mind was filled with so much to do all at once – the trip, taking care of last minute business and home details, along with the addition of new doctor appointments and tests. But once we walked onto the airplane, all that busyness came to an abrupt halt. The flight was a long one and my mind settled down on one thing – this new diagnosis. I came up with one conclusion – I DON’T WANT TO GO ON THIS NEW JOURNEY of battling breast cancer! I really wanted to come on this trip, but I REALLY don’t want this new journey that’s ahead for me.
Now, don’t get me wrong, I absolutely belive in miracles, because I’m truly a walking miracle myself. And I absolutely believe that our God – Father, Son, Jesus Christ, and Holy Spirit still heals today, and that sometimes He heals in miraculous ways even using medicine. I believe that He can heal me and that He will heal me. What I don’t know is how He will choose to do that.
So with that said and even knowing that truth, I don’t want to go on this new journey, but…. this one is out of my control, just like the Lyme Disease and a few other journeys I’ve been on in my life. I didn’t choose it; I certainly don’t want it; and I don’t like it. HOWEVER, I do know the One who is in control of my life, and I DO trust Him with every ounce of my being. I totally believe that nothing in this life can touch me without my loving God filtering every single part of it – for my good and His glory. You see, as I’ve walked with Jesus Christ through good and bad times, I’ve come to know Him very personally. As I read His Word; pray with Him; fellowship with His body, the church; experience the love of my husband and children; and see the beautiful faces of my grandchildren and so much more, I’ve seen His face up close and personal.
I saw Him that day so many years ago, when He bent down and lovingly reached into that deep, dark pit that I was in and offered me His hand. As I took His hand, He pulled me out of that pit and rescued me through His great salvation, healing and deliverance. I’ve seen and experienced Him carrying me through the desert during wilderness times, holding me close when I’ve lost loved ones, speaking loving and tender thoughts to me when I felt all alone and abandoned, and celebrating and rejoicing with me over the good things in my life. I’ve also seen and experienced Him through spiritual and physical battles where He showed Himself as the supreme commander who leads us to victory.
Because I know my God, I know His character, and I know that He’s all loving and trustworthy, I choose to surrender to His will and His way in my life. I choose to surrender to Him and trust that He’s guiding me on this new journey through uncharted territories. In my humanness, this isn’t necessarily easy, but I know from experience that He’s definitely working a good plan in my life, and in fact, He’s working the very BEST plan for my life. This is true for your life as well no matter what you’re going through. For those who love God and are called according to His purposes, He’s working out good plans for you right now! (Romans 8:29) No matter what you’re going through and even though it may not feel or look like it’s good, He’s working the best plan for you, it’s already in the works, and it’s going to be GOOD!
So today, I hold onto the truth of His Word that God is with me and that He has gone before me and will never leave me. Deuteronomy 31:6 says, “Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you,” and Deuteronomy 31:8 says, “It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; He will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.” and again in Hebrews 13:5, “…for He has said, I will never leave you nor forsake you.” He’s here for you as well. Reach out and take His hand and let Him lead you into His love, goodness, grace and mercy!
Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to
prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
The Journey Begins
Thanks for joining me!
If you’ve ever questioned or wondered if God speaks to us personally, then please read on, andlet me share with you how this journey began. Almost 6 weeks ago on a Friday night, I was going to bed. My head hadn’t been on the pillow for more than a few minutes and I was still wide awake. Totally out of the blue, a very clear thought came into my mind, “You have a lump in your breast.” But, if you can believe it, I didn’t listen and ignored what I heard and went on to sleep. The next morning, without even a thought of what I had heard the night before, my hand went right to the lump. Like an arrow goes to its target, my hand went right to the lump reminding me of my thought the night before. Yes, I was shocked.
The words in my mind that night were from my loving Father, through Jesus Christ, and the power of the Holy Spirit speaking directly to me.Not only did Jesus Christ speak to me, He directed, maybe through an angel, my hand to go right to the mass. He is so intimately involved in our lives, and He loves each of us so much and what He desires above all is relationship with us. This isn’t about religion, but about relationship with a very real, very much alive, very much engaged God. He is all loving, all caring and all faithful.
During the last six weeks, I found myself at multiple doctor’s offices, testing facilities and eventually in a breast surgeon’s office scheduling surgery. I have received prayer from the elders at our church and several groups of friends. The Lord took me to City Life, a gathering in the name of Jesus Christ of young men and women in their 20’s and 30’s. There I received prayer, and then a young man in his late 20’s or early 30’s gave me a mighty word from the Lord which has filled my heart with faith, hope, and life (which I will talk about in a later post).
Tomorrow it will be a week since the surgery to remove 2 masses followed up with a section biopsy. I’ve seen God working in new ways as He has revealed to me clearly, how I am in the palm of His hands. He has covered me with His peace and grace which have truly surpassed understanding. I have to admit that I so hoped that I wouldn’t get a call from the surgeon, but yesterday, late afternoon, the phone rang. It was her. Honestly, I had thought that if I saw her name come up on my phone, I would totally freak out and fear would take over. But it didn’t. The peace that surpasses understanding covered me like a warm, heavy blanket, and THERE WAS NO FEAR in Jesus name. I stood in perfect peace as she spoke the dreaded words, “Both masses are cancer.”
Early this morning, my husband and I met with the breast surgeon to discuss my case. She was extremely thorough, and went over everything. Again, the peace of God covered both my husband and me. In fact, we’ve seen this same peace covering our family through most of this. His covering is not just for me, but for my husband, my family and our friends. The truth is, Father God, through Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit, the Triune God, is ALWAYS working a good plan. He always is doing good for us. We live in a broken world where sin abounds, where bad things happen to good people, and where we just can’t control and explain many things. But… it’s in this very place where Jesus Christ comes in and works His perfect plan through saving, healing and delivering us. He is truly a good, good Father!
Many years ago now, Jesus Christ reached down, took my hand, and pulled me out of the bottom of a deep, deep pit. He saved me, healed me and delivered me and my life has never been the same. If you don’t know this Triune God – Father, Son, Jesus Christ, and Holy Spirit – please don’t let another day go by without calling out to Him. He hears you, He loves you, and He wants a relationship with you.
Much love and many blessings to you.
Philippians 4: 6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Hearing the Voice of God: My Journey with Breast Cancer 